This whole week has been a whirlwind! I realized yesterday that I have had after-work plans every day for over a week. From yoga, to dinner with my sisters, to a Tastefully Simple party, then going out of town, dinner with friends, more yoga, and more time with my sisters, it’s been about ten days since I’ve just come home from work and collapsed on the couch. Gone are the days of my first trimester – and yes, I am finally experiencing that fabled burst of energy!
It’s also been a hard week emotionally. The psalm I posted on Monday is one that I read a lot over the summer. Our sermon series at church this summer was on the Psalms, and the sermon on Psalm 42 was titled “Praying Our Glory Days“. I had never thought of this Psalm in that light (mostly because whenever I read the first few verses my mind went back to that insipid old Sunday School song), but the more I read it this summer, the more my mind was brought back to my own “glory days“.
These things I remember
as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go to the house of God
under the protection of the Mighty One
with shouts of joy and praise
among the festive throng.
I mean, that used to be how we lived. I realized before my mom passed away that I couldn’t remember what it was like before she had cancer. I still don’t. I just remember days and days and days of just … joy. Nothing that we thought was sad was really actually sad. Before my mom left us, I realized I did not know what it was like to be able to think about my parents without worrying, and to not have to live with this dark fear weighing in the back of my mind. To me it sounded (and still sounds) like complete luxury.
Do me a favor: If your parents are both in excellent health and you have no reason to believe one will die in the near future and thus that your future children will never know them, then pray tonight and thank God for this blessing. It’s easy to take your family for granted and to always think they’ll be there. They might not.
Anyway. So not only has that been on my mind, but there’s also this gem that I saw at Panera over the weekend (click to see it bigger):
This generated a much longer discussion, but oh man. This just summed up how irritating I’ve found ~~Breast Cancer Awareness Month~~ this year. I know that I just am extra emotional about it this year (obviously) and I have a lot of generalized anger, but seriously. Wearing pink will not protect you from getting cancer, and getting a mammogram will not necessarily save your life. I feel so doom-and-gloom saying this, but it’s true, and I’m sick of breast cancer being presented as some kind of growth experience we can all learn from, or worse – trivialized into something people forget is actually a horrible, deadly disease with a huge mortality rate.
Do me another favor: don’t give to breast cancer awareness campaigns. I’m pretty sure everyone knows what breast cancer is. Give to cancer research instead, or to organizations that fund treatment for rural or lower-income individuals. We need a cure, and reliable access to treatment – not more “awareness”.
At any rate. I really did not start blogging tonight to talk about all this. I wanted to blog tonight to show off our Halloween costumes from this week’s dinner. (Really!) So let’s end this post on a positive note, shall we?
Karen was Cleopatra:
Guess what Steve and I were!
Can you guess?
Of course! We’re Buddy and Teaker! Isn’t it obvious? Steve is Teaker because he’s long and lean, and I am Buddington because of my big Buddy belly*.
Leah and Chad could only wear their costumes in spirit (they had a nightmare of a night and day with a sick little Evie), but they were the Neverland Pirates. You can tell they watch a lot of Disney Channel.
Emotionally I am feeling better today. Yoga helps a lot, and just some days are better than others, but I still can’t get through a long car drive without my train of thought constantly being interrupted with GOD I MISS HER. But I don’t think that will ever go away.
* I am going to get huge.