No deep thoughts to report tonight, dear readers, just some of this:
Why is it he never does this for me?
It’s been one of those weeks where every day I wake up wondering why it’s not Friday. No real reason — I am just feeling tired these days, not just physically but mentally as well. I struggle with knowing how to respond to mental fatigue, so I’ve just been kind of moving through my days in a fog, waiting for … what, I don’t know exactly. Waiting for the weariness to lift.
Hope springs eternal, though: I am half hoping that part of my problem has been as simple as a) dehydration and b) poor sleep quality. I’m attempting to amend both through a combination of guzzling a ton of water and sleeping on a three-inch memory foam mattress pad — both seem to have helped so far! I have never been particularly good at sleeping (lying in bed on the other hand … ) but I have been spoiled since pregnancy started — until just this week, when I’ve started waking up with pain in my hips from lying on my side. And to think! I’m only going to get bigger.
I feel like I’m reaching a point in my pregnancy where I’m starting to feel it more. I hear so many women early in their second trimester, after morning sickness eases, saying “I feel great! I keep forgetting that I’m pregnant!” — and I did feel that way, somewhat, though it was impossible for me to forget that I was pregnant what with how much I felt like I was expanding. But now my belly is starting to get in the way of things, I can’t lie on my back to do my SI joint stretches anymore, and getting up off the couch or floor is much more challenging. Four more months to go!
— But I will say that since I had the ultrasound last week, I have felt a MUCH deeper connection to the baby. Up until now, I have been thinking about the baby in a much more theoretical, detached sort of way, and I had to keep reminding myself that it was a real baby in there and not just something abstract.
Hi there, baby.
But now that we’ve been able to see the baby up close again, and see him moving and twisting and turning — not to mention feeling him kick and punch me from inside — and not to mention that I can think of the baby not as “he?” now but as my son (!!!) — he’s become so much more real to me, and I love it. It’s helped me to feel much more connected with the baby and at peace with being pregnant, and to start enjoying it so much more — weight gain, back pain and all.
Hi there, baby! I can’t wait to put you in a dino onesie and snuggle you!